Mayci Neeley Opens Up About Surviving Alleged Domestic Abuse and Sexual Assault: "I Became Someone I Didn't Recognize"

Mayci Neeley used a TikTok post on Tuesday, Dec. 30, to reveal details about a past relationship she says was abusive, explaining how the experience altered her life and sense of self. She prefaced the video with a clear trigger warning before sharing her account.

Neeley said she had been tagged in multiple clips about domestic violence and sexual assault in recent weeks and wanted to speak directly to survivors. "I have experienced that, and I'm definitely an advocate for it," she told viewers, before addressing why some people return to abusive partners.

"When you are a victim, even I know to never compare my situation to another victim, because they're not the same," Neeley said. "I think one of the things I want to speak on, too, is about how women go back to their abusers. I can give my experience."

Discussing the reasons she stayed after alleging that her partner physically and sexually assaulted her, Neeley said blackmail was a major factor. She explained that her alleged abuser threatened to report photos of her drinking to university officials — potentially getting her expelled under a strict honor code — if she left or spoke out.

Neeley also cited psychological manipulation similar to Stockholm Syndrome, along with financial control, isolation, and alternating periods of kindness and abuse that create a toxic cycle. "Those small red flags at the beginning become your everyday life when you're in these relationships," she said.

She described the deep psychological toll the relationship took. "There's so much more psychological abuse and so many mental aspects of this that I can't even put into words that make you feel so crazy when you're going through it," Neeley said. "My entire personality changed. I became an angry person. I became someone that I don't even recognize."

Neeley said she filmed parts of the timeline while pregnant and later participated in a reunion postpartum, which made it difficult to process or publicly disclose her experiences on the show. She announced her pregnancy with her husband, Jacob, earlier this year.

Her forthcoming memoir, Told You So, expands on these experiences and is scheduled for publication on Oct. 7; it is available for preorder.

Closing her TikTok, Neeley addressed other survivors directly: "If you are a victim, this is triggering for you — I see you, I hear you, I'm with you, and I love you guys, and thanks for listening."

If you or someone you know has experienced sexual abuse or is in immediate danger, please seek help. You can text "STRENGTH" to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 to be connected with a certified crisis counselor.