Opinion column uses satire to critique anti-immigrant attacks on universities. It catalogs historical and modern contributions by foreign-born figures—Lafayette, Chinese railroad workers, Nobel laureates and contemporary researchers—while mocking Florida political efforts to curb H-1B hiring. The piece emphasizes the practical, legal, and academic consequences of restricting international faculty and highlights student and faculty concerns about weakening STEM programs.
What Have Immigrants Ever Done for America? A Satirical Look at Florida’s Push Against Foreign Academics
This article reviews a satirical opinion column that mocks anti-immigrant rhetoric aimed at higher education in Florida, while cataloguing the scientific, cultural, and institutional roles that foreign-born scholars play in U.S. universities and research centers.
Column Overview
The original piece adopts a mocking voice—pretending to wonder what "foreigners" have ever done for the United States—then lists well-known contributions from foreign-born people, ranging from Marquis de Lafayette’s support in the Revolutionary War to 19th-century Chinese railroad laborers. It moves from historical examples to contemporary politics, lampooning claims that foreign academics "clog" American colleges and take jobs that should go to native-born citizens.
Key Examples and Names
The column ridicules the idea that celebrated scientists such as Albert Einstein or Paul Dirac—both foreign-born and central to modern physics—should have been replaced by unspecified "real Americans." It highlights high-profile hires and scholars connected to Florida institutions:
- Ernst von Dohnányi: Hungarian composer and teacher hired by Florida State University in 1949.
- Paul Dirac: British-born Nobel laureate and former Lucasian Professor of Mathematics, later associated with FSU in the 1980s.
- Dr. Likai Song: M.D./Ph.D. researcher working on cancer and HIV vaccines, educated at Harvard and FSU, born in China.
- Peter Gorkov: Russian-born physicist who develops magnetic resonance probes at the National High Magnetic Field Laboratory in Tallahassee.
- Hossam Ashour: Egypt-born researcher at USF, cited in the column as an example of a highly productive international scientist.
Facts, Figures, And Claims
The column mixes satire with statistics and political reporting: it notes that foreign-born researchers represent about 25% of U.S. Nobel Prize winners and reports that Florida’s colleges and universities employ more than 60,000 people, with roughly 1.7% described as foreign — a figure the columnist translates into roughly 1,020 positions. The piece also cites reporting that many STEM faculty at institutions such as the University of Miami are on H-1B visas.
Political Context
Governor Ron DeSantis has urged Florida’s Board of Governors to reduce H-1B hiring at state institutions, calling such appointments "abuse." The column parodies these calls and highlights practical constraints: H-1B visas and immigration policy are controlled at the federal level, which complicates state actions. The piece also references federal proposals and rhetoric—such as a reported plan to raise H-1B costs, social-media screening of international students, and aggressive reviews of naturalization—alongside legal challenges from unions, state attorneys general, and business groups.
Responses From Academia And Students
Faculty defenders are quoted calling critics "ignorant, naive, blindsided or just generally racist," and emphasize the value international scholars bring to health care, engineering, education, and basic research. Some students and departments warn that removing international faculty could weaken STEM education and research capacity; others are skeptical of the need for foreign hires in every position.
This piece satirizes and amplifies nativist talking points—quoting officials and opponents verbatim in places—while cataloguing the scientific, cultural, and institutional roles that foreign-born scholars and professionals play in American higher education and research.
Conclusion
Whether read as satire or serious opinion, the column surfaces real tensions: the balance between protecting domestic labor markets and sustaining high-skill research and teaching through international talent; the limits of state authority over immigration; and the political theater of targeting universities. It argues—ironically—that efforts to purge foreign influence from Florida higher education are both impractical and at odds with the longstanding contributions of immigrant scientists and scholars.
