Former Firefighter Allegedly Drove Eight Hours Armed To Attack Ex’s Family After FaceTime Breakup

Summary: A former firefighter allegedly drove from Maine to South Toms River, New Jersey, armed and prepared to attack his ex-girlfriend’s family after she ended their relationship during a FaceTime call. Police say officers shot and wounded the suspect when he attempted to force his way into the family home on April 29. He now faces multiple attempted murder and weapons charges and is being held without bail.

Police in South Toms River, New Jersey, say a borough officer shot 37-year-old Brian Lanzim on the evening of April 29 after he arrived at his ex-girlfriend’s parents’ home armed and threatening violence, according to a May 7 news release from the Ocean County Prosecutor's Office and local reporting by the Asbury Park Press and The Independent.

Alleged Drive and Threats

Prosecutors say Lanzim, who had recently moved to Maine for work after 18 years as a firefighter and EMT, allegedly drove about eight hours back to New Jersey after his Toms River ex ended their relationship on a FaceTime call. During that call, the woman reportedly heard a gun clicking and heard Lanzim say, “You don't know crazy yet.”

After the breakup, the woman told police she received threatening text messages from Lanzim, including messages that allegedly said, "If your father is there, I'm going to have to take him out," and "If you stand between me and my kids, I'm going to do what I need to do." Prosecutors said he also threatened to leave her father “pulseless in the driveway” and declared, “If I can't have you, no one can.”

Confrontation And Injuries

Authorities say they were alerted by the woman and were waiting at the Dover Road residence when Lanzim arrived. Assistant Prosecutor Mara Brater told a hearing Lanzim "was ready for war," and prosecutors say officers found two firearms, a bulletproof vest and 15 large-capacity magazines in his vehicle.

According to charging documents and local reporting, Lanzim drove across the front lawn and toward officers, who took cover. He allegedly exited his vehicle and tried to enter the locked home. South Toms River officers confronted him at the door. One officer, identified by the Asbury Park Press as Sgt. Muhammad Ali, fired and struck Lanzim in the pelvis and hand. Lanzim was disarmed, treated at a hospital, and later booked into Ocean County Jail.

Audio referenced in an affidavit includes an officer yelling, "Brian, Brian, put it down," a man shouting "No," followed by five gunshots. Recordings reportedly captured Lanzim crying and saying he had "lost her," adding, "Tell her and the boys I love her."

Charges And Defense

Prosecutors have charged Lanzim with multiple offenses, including three counts of attempted murder, two counts of possession of a weapon for an unlawful purpose, two counts of unlawful possession of a weapon, unlawful use of body armor, burglary, terroristic threats, and 22 counts for possession of large-capacity ammunition magazines. He was admitted to Ocean County Jail on May 4 and is being held without bail pending further court proceedings.

At a hearing, Lanzim’s attorney, Marissa Koerner, said he has bipolar disorder and was receiving psychiatric treatment in Maine. She argued he was experiencing a severe mental health crisis following the breakup and recent job loss earlier this year.

Investigation And Resources

The April 29 incident remains under investigation by local authorities. If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit thehotline.org. Calls are free, confidential, and available 24/7 in more than 170 languages.

Details in this article are based on statements from the Ocean County Prosecutor’s Office and reporting by the Asbury Park Press, The Independent, and People. Allegations have been reported as noted; charges are ongoing and defendants are presumed innocent until proven guilty in court.